If I could rewind the year and start it again, there are things I would remember.
1. There is a sound argument for owning more than one pair of reading glasses. A repair with insulation tape is so NOT a good look.
2. Refrain from getting a passport photo straight after a trip to the hairdressers. It seemed a good idea at the time. But now it has come back attached to the document in question I realise the fatal flaw. When I disembark from a plane looking my usual scruffy self (and let’s not even think about a night flight) just how well is it going to go at Border Control?
3. An upholstery needle has a point at both ends. Making it perfectly possible to incur a stab wound to the hand and the thigh simultaneously. Ask me how I know this.
4. There is a universal truth known as Murphy’s Law. Or Sod’s Law if you are so inclined. Either way: if it can go wrong, it will.
5. If needing buy-in for a project from the Other Half the optimal time is Friday evening. Gin and Tonic night.
6. Never let crocosmia run to seed. Especially when the previous house owner laid chicken wire throughout one of your largest borders. Should this unfortunate eventuality occur, on no account leave the plants so long that the bulbs grow wider than the holes.
7. Never declare that a garden border is “done”. Especially if you have a blog and publish it in full view of the world. If you do it’s a cast iron certainty that the very next week you will rip the whole lot out and start again.
8. If there is a gap in the fence sheep will find it.
9. If an electric gate is going to fail it will do it on the day you are already running late for an appointment leaving you trapped on the wrong side.
10. Always tackle a pest problem before it multiplies out of control.
11. And NEVER start a decorating project six weeks before Christmas with sweeping ill-conceived assertions like “oh there’s still plenty of time..”
Ho Ho Ho.