The Plumber’s Crack


The photo above shows the extent of the additional space created in the kitchen. The red line surrounds the open floorspace that we had before. Between the red and the blue, the run of old units that incorporated the fridge. To the right of the blue line was the built in pantry.



Opposites attract. So they say. Inevitably, there will be marital ‘discussions’ along the way about how the house renovation should proceed. But we’ve held it together for almost 30 years now, so we can get through the small matter of a new kitchen. Can’t we? The latest topic for debate has been the plumber. Two of them came around to quote for the work. My choice was young, intelligent, companionable and highly recommended. Mike’s choice was… half the price.

Mike’s Plumber is a generously proportioned sort of guy who clearly enjoys a pint or two of an evening. In the absence of a waist there is little to prevent his trousers from riding down especially when he has head, shoulders and monkey wrench in the back of a cupboard trying to connect up a pipe. It is not a pretty sight.

Mike’s Plumber has constructed a run of pipework from the downstairs loo washbasin out into the hall, to supply the sink and the washing machine in their transitory home. To avoid drilling through the walls for what is (one fervently hopes) a temporary arrangement, the pipes pass through the doorway of the downstairs loo necessitating the removal of the door. Mike and I utilise the facilities offered by the bathroom upstairs. The builders have just taken to whistling. Loudly. Or going for a walk in the woods.


Can you see in the first photo the large damp patch, bottom right? We found it on lifting the rotten lino that once covered the old pantry floor. Just after this picture was taken our builder made an exploratory hole at the bottom of the wall. Mike put his hand through to the other side. It came out covered in water and mud. I have the sinking feeling that his plumber may be around for quite a while.